When A Man Buys You A Drink, It’s Not A GIFT it’s An INVESTMENT

Ladies, the way that some of you look when you leave the house [especially women in my city, Toronto – where some of the most beautiful women in the world reside] I can’t blame you for FEELING YOURSELVES and thinking y’all are whats hot in the streets. But if you think men buy you drinks just to BASK in your glory, you’re DEAD WRONG.

I can not state with 100% accuracy that men who will buy a woman a drink just to see her smile and then walk off to never see her again don’t exist. Women themselves tell me this happens so who am I to argue? But I know this though, that dude does NOT represent the majority of men and his punk-a*s doesn’t even represent a large amount. So this piece is not about the 6% of men who are the exception, but the 94% of men who are the rule. And the rule is very simple: Any man that buys you a drink wants SOMETHING from you and buy accepting the drink you are informally accepting the IDEA of entertaining his request.

My parents always told my sister that nothing in life is FREE, and I’m glad she understands that theory because she applies that to every aspect of her life. What some of you women who accept FREE drinks at the club don’t understand is that when a man offers to buy you a drink he is specifically doing that as a sign of interest in you. Now I won’t say that every man that offers you a drink just does so because he wants your nani, but he does want SOMETHING, whether it be an interesting conversation, or just for you to chill with him by the bar because he knows attractive women are interested in men who look like other attractive women are interested in him [get it?]. Nothing in life is FREE and that drink comes with him wanting SOMETHING.

Now the big problem is that women feel like by accepting his “Gift” she should not feel obligated to even say a ‘thank you’ to him because she doesn’t owe him anything and she didn’t even ask him to send the drink over. I agree [which is another reason I ain’t buying a stranger a DAMN thing – http://www.thisisyourconscience.com/?p=2432] but only to an extent because the reality is this: The drink doesn’t need to come with a note attached saying “hey I’m sending you this drink so I can get your number” because that social agreement is already in place and women, you are LYING to yourself if you think otherwise.

Let’s stop playing games: If you don’t want his ugly-a*s following you around all night or bothering you then simply say no. Women, this is not the caveman era, you are independent and have your own money, so you don’t NEED a man to buy you a drink unless you are a BASIC BOTTOM B*TCH. If you don’t want to have anything to do with him, then don’t accept his alcohol-investment and keep it moving. But if you do, and you have to spend the next two hours at the club playing Bourne Identity all over the nightclub trying to dip and duck his a*s because you tired of being harrassed it’s nobodies fault but your own.

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog ThisIsYourConscience.com, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.