Ladies, If You Catch Your Man JERKING OFF, You Should Be More ASHAMED Than Him

So I had a long conservation with one of my homegirls overseas who recently got married to her long-time boyfriend and they finally moved in together – and she accidentally stumbled in on him backing his fist in front of his laptop to some Japanese Sailor Moon pr0n. She told me she cussed his a*s out for being nasty and backing his fist in their common-area living room, but I told her the reality of the situation: “If he’s so desperate as to pleasure himself in the middle of the day in the middle of the house, chances are YOU ain’t doing something right.”

Ladies, let me let you in on a little secret – All men like masturbating – but we LOVE getting nani WAY more. For a man to have to an all-access pass to your nani, yet RATHER choose to make love to Handgela, you need to reaccess somethings about your sex game because he is TERRIBLY dissatisfied.

Now don’t get me wrong, just because a man is in a relationship it doesn’t mean he will stop masturbating 100%, but if you are LIVING together, both employed and there are NO kids in the picture, anytime his richard pops up you should be there to slam him back down like the weakest dude in wrestling class. YES, there are times you will go without having sex for an entire roster of different reasons, but there is NO excuse for your love life to dissipate to the point of him cheating on you with Palmela on a constant basis.

Now when you catch him pleasuring himself and you get all mad or embarrassed or awkward, and start thinking that he needs to be ashamed of putting the Vulcan death grip on his richard, YOU need to look into YOUR own performance and wonder where the disconnect is occurring. Maybe you have dry nani, and he chose his fist over dodging the tumbleweeds rolling past your clitoris or the bull-skull right by your labia.

So allow me to say what most men won’t: Ladies you control sex. You control it’s frequency AND intimacy, and as men it’s our job to handle business and take care of satisfying you and keeping richard up to the task and not ungracefully bowing out early like Tyson knocking out Berbick. But with that said, the sexiness you bring to the table is what will determine the intensity of your sexual relationship.

So next time you come home early and unexpected and catch your man backing his fist to, don’t stand and looked shocked in disapproving disbelief – get on your knees, slap his hand away and remind him why YOU are much better than any fantasy on

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.


  1. Lynn

    08/18/2016 at 5:09 PM

    I agree wholeheartedly; but I also like to watch my man jack off.

  2. Key

    09/27/2016 at 2:20 AM

    My lady has had an attitude lately, and I’ve basically had to ask for sex every time we have it nowadays. So tonight I jacked off right besides her. Now I’m laying up in bed thinking didI make things better or worse? I need to hear what women think of a man beating his meat

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