A while back I wrote a piece on women who keep condoms on them and after having a very insightful conservation with a couple female friends I learned something I NEVER knew before: They told me the reason they provide dudes with condoms is because some musty ass men are actually INTENTIONALLY getting women pregnant whom they deem to be very attractive, for every reason from just wanting to lock her down all the way to ensuring they have attractive babies. Someone, PLEASE tell me this is just a bad joke.
A have a very attractive lady friend from Trinidad who told me arguably the most ridiculous story I’ve ever heard:
She was set up on a date by her parents with an atypically nerdy dude, who had a funny personality and a quirky sense of humour, but you could tell was somewhat uncomfortable around VERY attractive women like her. Now my friend typically dates big, rough, rugged and somewhat thugged out dudes, so she gave this guy a completely fair and honest chance because she KNEW she couldn’t keep dating the same guys and getting mad because she kept getting the SAME exact results.
So a month of dating goes by and she is getting more acclimated to his personality and senses he is not only a very smart and genuine person but that he TRULY cares for her, so she decides to get it in with ol’ boy. Unfortunately he is as use to p*ssy as Danny Glover’s lips are to chapstick, so he was having a hard time stroking her because after a couple pumps he was ready to bust faster than Ed O’Bannon’s NBA career. So she took his richard and started to gently stroke him through the condom just to relax him and help his mind drift away from the tightness of the nani. Would you believe that 45 seconds later, she got unexpectedly shot in the face like she was trying to guard Dirk Nowitzki on the perimeter. The fact that she looked like Ricky after he got shot in Boys In The Hood had less to do with her aversion to Money-Shot facials and MORE to do with the surprise of semen shooting through a condom’d up richard.
After jumping two feet directly into his ass, he finally admitted to poking a hole in the condom because he thought being a 31 year old “geek” he may never have an opportunity to be with someone as fine as her again.
I’m not sure why his monkey-ass admitted that, but I know he wished he HADN’T after she chokeslammed him like she was The Big Show. But it made me ponder how frequent of a practice this REALLY is and it seems guarding against this type of behaviour is an EXTREMELY serious precaution many women feel they have to take nowadays.
Though I’m still VERY confused as to why a man would feel impregnating a woman clandestinely on purpose would EVER be a necessary route, I suggest women not only take a more proactive approach in their sexual safety, but also take a closer look at some of the FROWSY dudes that even come around you bringing lame ass sex talks.
This Is Your Conscience