A Man Is GAY If He Get’s His Salad Tossed By A Woman? REALLY?!

Dream Girl? She'll toss your salad - and then toss your salad

Salad Tossing: During foreplay, this is the act of licking your partner’s anus.

I figured I would put up that definition first and foremost for anyone who is unclear that we are not actually talking about how a man making an actual salad in the kitchen can be considered effeminate. Today we are going to discuss how RIDICULOUS it is to call a man GAY for wanting to have his salad tossed EXCLUSIVELY by a woman – and how problematic it is to even call a dude GAY for doing something sexual with a WOMAN.

To begin, I will NOT definitely say that there’s NOTHING a man can do sexually with a woman that shouldn’t raise some significant RED FLAGS on his sexuality. For example, any man that is willing to wear panties, thongs, bra’s, garter belts, thigh highs, or any other form of female lingerie is SUSPECT. A man suggesting his girlfriend penetrates him with a strap-on is also SUSPECT. But here’s the reality of the subject: There is no hard and fast rule that can be created to determine what sexual acts done between a man and a woman should be categorized as potentially homosexual. In some men and women’s minds, the rule is based exclusively on him deriving ANY pleasure from anything happening in or around his [and sometimes her] ass – and though I agree to an EXTENT, a tongue can NOT and should NOT be grouped in the same category with richards, fists, dildo’s and any other blunt, phallic-shaped instrument.

Now let’s just be brutally clear about something: The definition of gay should be simple and consistent in the sense that it refers to a man desiring to engage in a sexual activity with another man. What heterosexual people need to come to grips with is the fact that gay people and straight people DO engage in similar sexual activities no matter HOW hard they try to deny it. Gay men and straight men both receive fellatio, give anal sex and receive hand jobs – but OBVIOUSLY the difference between the act being homo or hetero is based on their PARTNER’S gender – so why should salad tossing not be the same?

Salad Tossing saved your grandparent's marriage

I am usually very much against the saying “you can’t knock it unless you’ve tried it” because that’s typically a load of HORSE SH*T. I’ve never had a 2 girls, 1 cup session in my life, and I’ll be DAMNED if you say I need to try THAT to knock it, but this is an act I will definitely use that phrase for. Getting deep-throated, ball-hummed and then salad tossed could be the MOST pleasure you ever receive from a woman’s mouth EVER. Rusty Trombones for the WIN.

But because the male rectum is a place of such social taboo, it’s seen as indecent to even entertain the idea that pleasure could be derived from a kiss and/or a lick, but it’s NOT wrong to pursue that pleasure. But if he wants a kiss. a lick, and then to be finished off with a 9-inch banana and then have whip-creamed squirted out the can on his ass and back while you pull his hair, well then you can officially look at him like:

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog ThisIsYourConscience.com, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.


  1. Karma

    08/18/2016 at 11:46 AM

    Okay this is understandable but wouldn’t you consider a man who likes his salad tossed unmanly? Because if a man can bend over for a woman he can sit in a woman’s lap and let her carry him as well (in my opinion) & wouldn’t you say that allowing a woman to toss your salad sometimes can open up other doors .. Making u want more and more?

  2. Gerad Williams

    08/23/2016 at 6:43 PM

    My girl has done it to me before, but I didn’t ask her to. She’s a freak, so I didn’t try to stop her. Now if she would’ve stuck something in me, it would have been a problem. The only way you can be gay, is if you’re attracted to the same sex or do something with the same sex.

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