Knocked UN-Conscience: Why The HELL Is Mary J Singing For Some Damn Chicken?!

I was having a convo with a friend in Atlanta Sunday night and in the middle of talking about who would win the NCAA Championship [Shout out to Kentucky and Anthony Davis’ future stylist who will hopefully get him to remove Captain Morgan’s moustache from his eyebrows] this dude just breaks out laughing his ass off. I mean, laughing to the point I could hear him crying through Skype. When he finally regained his composure and filled me in on the joke, he explained that he just saw a commercial of Mary J Blige performing on a lunch table inside Burger King singing about the benefits of friend chicken.

For those of you who haven’t seen it yet, check here:

If you aren’t laughing right now, let my boy fill you in on why you SHOULD be, as per our convo Sunday night:

“Nigga, this GOTTA be a joke! She standing in a wooden booth singing to three white kids in BK crowns in a ghetto ass mic that hasn’t been tuned properly! [LOL] Nigga, she wearing a rhinestone-cowboy leather jacket with Rick Ross shades on and a Foghorn Leghorn lace-front! [LOL] Bruh, they ain’t even give her no damn lyrics, she just reading the ingredients off the side of the box! Ain’t no way this sh*t real!”

Sadly, it is.

Now, there are two schools of thought on this as to why I personally find this commercial troubling. A) I absolutely DESPISE NIGG-ADVERTISEMENTS [Like I wrote about HERE] and (B) can we just KEEP some things off-limits SOLELY for our self respect if nothing else? We, as a community, agreed that marketing fried chicken, watermelon, jewelry and liquor in an overtly coonish manner [i.e. singing, rapping, playing basketball, or anything else overly-niggerish] after being embarrassed by major-media for so long with so little power was BENEATH us. So can’t we just live up to our own-damn standards for once?

But Paul Mooney said it best:

It wasn’t cool 20 years ago, so why should we accept it as being cool today?

If your answer is: “Well, at least she’s getting paid for it!” that just simply disgusts me to hear. Because then we start entering into a mind frame where there is NOTHING sacred above the all mighty dollar. Fact is, Mary J. is RICH and no matter HOW you may feel about her recent album sales, she doesn’t NEED to sing on an impromptu stage in the middle of a Burger King to put food on her table. But go ahead and let this slide and say it’s no big deal – but I don’t wanna hear SH*T from y’all when Condi Rice starts tap-dancing in relaxer commercials and Cornel West hits the dougie and Cat Daddy to help promote Red Kool-Aid and Purple Drank.

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.


  1. lincolnanthonyblades

    04/03/2012 at 6:31 AM

    Ladies & Gentlemen, What Are YOUR Thoughts On Mary J's Commercial?!

  2. YShaws

    04/03/2012 at 7:47 AM


  3. Paul B.

    04/03/2012 at 9:57 AM

    I can't. I just can't. I don't want to see her like that. I want to remember her as the "What's the 411 and My Life" Mary, without all the dysfunction.

  4. @akaearkhandi

    04/03/2012 at 10:32 AM


    This is a tough one for me…
    I don't know whether to laugh, or laugh into an ashamed cry… or just be straight up embarrassed. I've been hearing about this commercial for a bit, and now that I've finally seen it… I WISH I didn't.

    First of all, the setting of this commercial is borderline Chuck E. Cheese animatronic stage show GHETTO as shit! No one was even talking to her?! The lights just dim and she goes off like the Bird Lady at Chuck E. cotdamn Cheese!

    She even looks hesitant to even start singing like, "I know the industry gonna rip me a new one over this" (but then the director is in the back holding up and pointing at her cheque and waving at her to start) – or is that just me – or is that just the lack of a damn script of Any sort!

    Apart from the beat being absolute coonery.. There is just too much wrong going on in this short unproductive film. It is actually saddening.

    But, this makes me think:
    a) what's going on in the industry (that things would even come to this)
    b) why she believed this was okay (her management included)
    c) that this is the most unnecessary yet ridiculous thing that Everyone is unfortunately going to remember toppa top "Mary J. Blige – What's the 411?" for …

  5. Pe.Riche.

    04/03/2012 at 11:18 AM

    "…but I don’t wanna hear SH*T from y’all when Condi Rice starts tap-dancing in relaxer commercials…"

    You know damned well that Condi don't get no relaxer;

  6. Kam

    04/03/2012 at 12:30 PM

    This is Coonery and Buffoonery. A strong part of me says the idea of someone black jumping around sining about chicken will never really sit well with me.

    Then again maybe Mary felt its 2012 and that the stereotype of "black people love (fried )chicken" shouldn't affect us.

  7. STM2F

    04/18/2012 at 10:22 AM

    I feel like, as a huge fan of her music, I've just been slapped in the face by MJB =/ Why was she doing this rubbish – she's far too successful! All I'm saying is, you won't find Denzel Washington playing a role (let alone a foolish one) in a KFC advert, acting off the emotions behind 'tennnder, juuuicy friiiiiied chikun yuup'. Why has she dropped her standards??!

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