Are You A Ratchet Whisperer?

Fact: Her parent or legal guardian is RATCHET - so why even argue?!

Everyday on my Facebook Fan Page I like to entertain my fans with random pictures I find all over the internet. Some are hilarious, some are insightful, some are beautiful, some are grotesque and A LOT of them are of straight-up, deep-fried RATCHETNESS. I have posted pictures of everything from women with zip-on lace-fronts, to dudes posing with their baby in one hand and a nine millie in the other. As much as I am willing to slightly entertain the ideology that ratchetness can be somewhat subjective, the reality is that A LOT of it is NOT – and any person with common sense and self respect can typically point out ratchetness except the RATCHET WHISPERERS.

A Ratchet Whisperer is a person who can witness completely, ridiculously ratchet behaviour being done, and their initial reaction to it is to try and cogently and logically defend the behaviour or come up with a solid rationale as to WHY that behaviour is taking place. Worse of all, they will ATTACK whoever labels the behaviour ratchet and then hop on their “you without sin, cast the first stone” pedestal in a SORRY-ASS attempt to recognize the behaviour as common and subsequently normal.

Ratchet Whisperer’s, please go F*^K your collective selves.

There is some sh*t that is so hideous and wrong and absent of self-respect that our goal as a society should be to try and help them or [if they don’t want it, which most DON’T] laugh right the F*^K at them.

For Example:

This tattoo is RATCHETNESS personified:

Permanently marking your body with two women sucking d*ck, styled as a butterfly is CLASSLESS and, unless this chick is a pr0n star, will most likely not have ANY positive repercussions in her lifetime. Am I judging? HELL NAW. Am I gonna try to help her? HELL NAW, because I bet she loves that tattoo and doesn’t want to hear anything I have to say. So in turn I recognize she is RATCHET, laugh my ass off at her FAIL and keep it moving.

BUT, the Rachet Whisperer can’t have that. They need to talk about how the true beauty of the tattoo is going right over our heads, and then finish their ignorant rant screaming YOLO.

And once third, innocent parties get involved it becomes even WORSE, like THESE for example:

Any person with common sense will look at these pictures like “wow, that’s actually kinda F*^KED up – that child is being raised by DUMBASSES.”

But what does a Rachet Whisperer see?!

Picture 1: “The little girl doesn’t know what it means so it’s cool…OH LIKE YOU HAVEN’T DRESSED YOUR CHILD UP IN CLOTHES WITH GROWN-ASS MESSAGES ON IT?! He who ain’t got a damn sin, better dash that damn rock!”

Picture 2: “How y’all know the money wasn’t just gifts from the Godparents?! CHILDREN CAN’T POSE WITH SOME DOLLAR BILLS IN THE CRIB?! They who ain’t finna sin this year, go’ head with them damn stones!”

Picture 3:How y’all know she ain’t just posing showing her after-baby body?! So what if she’s in black lace boy panties, A WOMAN CAN’T POSE IN FRONT OF HER OWN DAMN MIRROR ANYMORE?! Unno tuh bloodclaat badmind so gwan fling yuh raatid stones dem!”

Look, here’s the biggest problem with being a ratchet whisperer: The fact that you feel the NEED to defend people CLEARLY doing f*^kery just proves YOU are the most RATCHET of them all.

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.


  1. lincolnanthonyblades

    05/15/2012 at 6:48 AM

    Ladies & Gentlemen, Do YOU Know Any Ratchet Whisperers? Hell, Do You Believe MOST Ratchetness Is Subjective Or Easy To Spot?!

  2. nikkic

    05/15/2012 at 7:57 AM

    OMG. The one with the child. there is NO f*****g excuse for that . None. The child sure as hell did not buy the shirt the so called adult did. Setting this child up for a pervert who will take one look at it and believe that shit. Then when shit happens to the kid, they will act befuddled as why such a thing took place. Some people should never be allowed to give birth. Disgusting

    • A Grown Ass Man

      05/15/2012 at 2:50 PM

      Same way I feel too

  3. Panamena

    05/15/2012 at 8:36 AM

    This is hilarious but true. I will never understand why some people support/excuse/condone this mess.

  4. NurseJilly

    05/15/2012 at 10:04 AM

    LMAO @ Ratchet Whisperers…

    Hilarious!! Every one of these parents needs a slap especially ones who dressed the little girl in the I love cock shirt that shit is disgusting..SMH

    • A Grown Ass Man

      05/15/2012 at 2:51 PM

      I crave to understand what goes through a parents mind when they put their daughter in a shirt like that

  5. krystllyght

    05/15/2012 at 10:06 AM

    Okay I guess I'm both ratchet and a ratchet whisperer. That first pic doesn't seem bad to me. Somebody put a wig on a baby as a joke and snapped a pic. Big whoop. I've done it. The rest, well that's pretty bad. If I saw that little girl with the c*ck shirt on, I would have to pull that parent aside. I remember seeing stuff like this on or something like that. Some of that stuff is truly appalling.

    • A Grown Ass Man

      05/15/2012 at 2:49 PM

      The problem with the first pic is that it's almost impossible to define whether it's a joke or not….not sure where you're from, but living in the south taught me a lot, mostly that weaves are being put on baby girls as young as 2 and 3 years old

      Sorry but I can't laugh, condone or smile at any of this…it's just sad to me

      • krystllyght

        05/15/2012 at 3:22 PM

        I'm giving the person the benefit of the doubt here. You're right we really don't know but I guess I'm just hoping it's a joke. I'm from the midwest and in my whole life, I've only seen one baby with weave. She had to be like 12 months or something. Looked stupid but I was a kid and couldn't speak on it. I think it's crazy that folks do that to their young girls ftr. What's wrong with kid hairdos?

  6. Paul B.

    05/15/2012 at 1:56 PM

    Um, I'm not sure that's a wig. Lol Ratchet is pretty easy to spot, and easy to defend if you're ratcher too.

    • Crystals_Back

      05/15/2012 at 5:26 PM

      I think extreme ratchet is easy to spot but there's a lot of mid-range ratchet that we are all guilty of…I have snuck a full plate of Jerk chicken to a movie theatre before…I don't think that's ratchet but who knows! LMAOO

      • Paul B.

        05/15/2012 at 7:36 PM

        I haven't done that one. lol

      • TJay

        05/20/2012 at 11:54 PM

        I've brought entire (roti) dinners to the movie theater, complete with beverages.

  7. Shaun

    05/17/2012 at 7:26 PM

    I find the pic with the newborn disgusting. Money is the nastiest thing out and they have that on the baby. That is past ratchet and straight up ignorant.

  8. CmonSenseDuh

    05/19/2012 at 10:55 PM

    The pic of the little girl in the c*ck shirt is photoshopped. The shirt ACTUALLY says ROCK. It's front an episode of "Toddlers & Tiaras"(search it on utube). Some weirdo shopped it for the gullible folks who believe everything they see on the internet. Seriously, you didn't do ANY research on that pic? O_o oh….ok…

  9. Shortstuff

    06/27/2012 at 5:52 PM

    When I glanced at the "butterfly" tramp stamp, I was like "ok thats not too unusual ratchetness?" But when I looked at it a little longer…. oh….. alright then…. now thats Ratchet LMAO!!!

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