Want To Know Why Your Relationships Never Work? Because You’re Always In One

Ladies & Gentlemen, have you ever wondered why your relationships always seem to hit a road block? Ot why you can’t seem to find a genuinely cool person who understands you and loves you for who you TRULY are? Well I’m here to tell you what the big problem is:

YOU.

It is absolutely NO coincidence that the people I know who are perpetually UNHAPPY in their relationships are also the same ones who are incapable of spending an adequate amount of time being SINGLE and on their own. I don’t give a damn what ANYONE tries to tell you,  after encountering a uniquely frowsy DOUCHEBAG we ALL need a second to catch our breaths, regroup and re-focus our minds on what our TRUE goals should be. The only positive of being in a terrible and dysfunctional relationship is the fact that it helps you GROW by teaching you a lot more about yourself and what type of people you need in your life – but how the HELL can you progress mentally and emotionally if you never even give yourself a second to study the Heaven and mostly Hell that person just put you through?

Too frequently people like to “Relationship Jump” by constantly dating and having some jackass all up in their grill. If you are ALWAYS with someone I can guarantee this: You will NOT be able to experience as much progressive personal growth as you NEED to be a mature functioning adult. Many of us are naturally loving, caring creatures with an innate need to work hard in a relationship and, in many cases, even put our significant other’s needs in front of our own. That is NOT how you achieve successful Self-improvement.

I’m NOT really sure what keeps men and women bouncing in and out of relationships, whether it’s the inability to have casual sex, the fear of being alone, or just simply being addicted to chasing love. But I DO know that constantly moving from one person to another prevents us from gaining true introspection into the person who means the MOST – ourselves.

Back in the days, when I was much younger I would get extremely frustrated when a sexy SINGLE girl would take herself OFF the dating-market because she wanted to focus on school, her job, or just be alone and focus on herself and what SHE wants. Now that I’m older, I can definitely chalk that up to me being mad she was taking her NANI off the market and depositing it into an ING Savings Account to grow stronger over time. But now I’m glad to say I’m mature enough to recognize how much strength, character and self-reflection it takes to be able to truly admit that you need time alone, not just for you to find the right person, but also for you to be the right person for someone deserving.

If there’s one part of this equation we don’t talk about enough, it’s the innocent bystanders who get their heart-broken because they choose to love YOU – yet YOUR ASS is in no mental or emotional condition to be a good boyfriend/girlfriend to them, because you never took a chance to let your past hurt and bitterness subside. Don’t just do YOURSELF a favour, do everyone else a favour by not passing along your hurt.

Because honestly folks, no one can provide you with what you truly want, if YOU don’t even know what you really deserve.  

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog ThisIsYourConscience.com, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.

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