STRONG Women Need STRONG LOVING

If there’s one thing I’ve stated on this blog many times, it’s my personal affinity for STRONG women. I even wrote a post dedicated to the massive sex appeal of business women, but one thing we often don’t talk about enough is what MANY of these women WISH they were getting in a relationship: Strong Loving. Now that term doesn’t refer to trying to beat the nani up like a baseball bat [or whatever synonym for POUND that’s currently hot in the streets] but what it means is having a man love HER with all HIS strength. That’s what MANY strong women deserve – and that’s where, unfortunately, a lot of dudes are falling short.

A few days ago, one of my friends asked me if I would ever date a woman who made more than me, had a great but busy career and had a similar type-A personality to me, to which I replied “hell yeah!” He then went on to ask me questions such as: “Well what would you do if she cussed you for making less money?” and “what would you do if she wanted YOU to sign a prenup?” and it made me realize one lingering problem with us men that we RARELY address: When it comes to dating successful, independent women we often focus too much on what they’re doing, and don’t pay ANY attention to what we’re NOT doing.

As he prattled on about all the potential negative scenarios that could arise out of dating a strong woman, I had to stop him and ask him what would HE do in those same situations. Before he even gave a specific answer, he basically said he would give her ass an ultimatum that she either learns to RESPECT him as a man, or he’s gonna BOUNCE – and that right there is why a LOT of us men are DEAD WRONG on this topic. By focusing all of our attention on her perceived short comings, we ignore that it’s OUR job as MEN to love her with all our STRENGTH, and that’s not just a rosy-analogy, it’s the ACTUAL truth.

That means having the STRENGTH to put up with her when her professional frustrations carry over to home. That means having the STRENGTH to be patient with her building her career while knowing that she see’s you as equally important – just not right now. That means having the STRENGTH to know that the occasional absence of her affection is not a sleight against the entire relationship, but rather a sign of her emotional and mental fatigue. But mostly it requires the STRENGTH to accept being on the OTHER end of the dating dichotomy, because everything I’ve stated above, are things women are CURRENTLY doing for men EVERYDAY.

But a strong woman is NOT just about her occupation in an office with a fancy title, because hell, a housewife can be a STRONG woman. The point is, accepting a loving relationship is NOT about forcing the woman to acquiesce to her standard gender role – it’s about having the STRENGTH to know that regardless of how the household income is split, who works more hours and who spends more time raising the kids – YOU’RE willing to do everything in YOUR power to love her the best you can – because she DESERVES it – and if the situation was reversed, you would want her to act the SAME exact way.

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog ThisIsYourConscience.com, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.

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