There’s No “Right” Age To Be READY For Marriage

Some of y’all are no more ready to get married than THESE two…

I’m really starting to think there must REALLY be an epidemic amongst my generation [late 20’s to mid 30’s] where we all FEEL like we needed to be READY for marriage YESTERDAY or else we are really FAILING at life. This topic really concerns me because I’m noticing relationships failing all around me with people of my age group because of one tricky relationship dynamic: When should a man or woman be READY to get married? The fact that many of us are NOT married is ONE thing, but let someone our age state we AREN’T ready for marriage just yet, and people will cuss our ass out like how Green Bay Packers fans cuss replacement refs.

And the one thing I find really HILARIOUS about this discussion, is that the concept of marriage is so heavily propagated as a NECESSITY of ALL of our young lives, that it seems childish and inconceivable for someone to NOT want to enter into a LIFELONG union without giving it adequate and sufficient thought. The way folks are acting out here, you would think marriage is akin to deciding if you want to order oxtails or curry goat at a Jamaican restaurant [“HURRY UP NUH MAN!”]. Listen, the concept of telling people that they need to create a hard deadline on MOST important life decisions is complete BS, but if there’s ONE union that you should definitely NOT rush into, it’s marriage. The truth is, there’s no “RIGHT” age to be READY for marriage, and if you are 30+ and STILL not ready, anyone who derides you for that is a DOUCHEBAG.

The problem with entering into the WRONG marriage [meaning one that you weren’t mentally ready for] is that it will SCAR you immensely for the REST of your life in ways you probably can’t imagine. Psychologically, you can develop insane trust or abandonment issues, as well as a HOST of other sh*t from committing your ENTIRE heart to someone BEFORE you were truly ready. Emotionally, you can inherit all types of debilitating issues embittering you from entering into a healthy relationship again. But more importantly, you waste your TIME and your EFFORT trying to appease people at the most inopportune moment for YOURSELF – the person that matters THE MOST.

I believe in love and I also believe in marriage [for some people NOT everybody] but more importantly, I believe the biggest key to entering into, or ensuring the success of, a relationship is advancing the seriousness of it at the EXACT moment YOU want to, regardless of what everyone around you thinks.

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.

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