I have a theory that I would like to share with y’all: The end of frowsy relationships are carried by the final remnants of a great sex life. One of the reasons I specifically NEVER give relationship advice [at all, but especially NOT to] people going through the final stages of their relationships DEATH is because they will NEVER take your advice – as long as their remained completely HOOKED on the multiple-orgasm-inducing nani or richard they are currently with. Even when every fibre of your mind, heart and soul is telling you to RUN for the door as fast as you can, and leave that musty teg-a-reg in a cloud of your DUST, you will be unable to fully pull yourself together and make your great escape UNTIL your BODY finally hops on board, and rejects their ass too.
The title for this post was inspired by Marsha Ambrosius’ new BIG tune “F*^k N Get It Over With” in the video below:
The reason I LOVE this song by Marsha Ambrosius is A) because her sexy-ass can get bent over the hood of a Lincoln LS and take hard backshots until she cums so hard she passes out on the radiator and B) because she proves a level of dating-cognition that most men and women could REALLY stand to learn: At some point you need to trust your mind that it’s over, get that final piece of break-up sex and BOUNCE [and then start the post-orgasmic rehabilitation until your NEXT great encounter].
Now this is CLEARLY easier said than done, and damn near ALL of us have been victims of extending relationships WAY past its expiration date because we just couldn’t ween ourselves OFF the other person’s body. Every dude knows what it’s like to have a woman you find sexy as hell who, even though you are going through serious problems, can still make your richard harder than hyperbolic geometry.
One day she comes home, you fight, give each other the silent treatment, fight again and then you go and lay down to sleep. Facing opposite sides of the room, the dude finally concedes and rolls over and pulls her back closer to his stomach. Finally feeling comforted and no longer willing to uphold the strenuous facade of anger, she relents and folds her arms over his. Her kisses the back of neck as they spoon together – and then a kiss turns into a soft, slow lick over her neck, which turns into him running his tongue over her collarbone and eventually turning her on to her back so his hands can have free range over her erect nipples as they lock lips and their tongues explore each others mouths. Soon he his pulling her nighty over her head, and running his tongue from the nape of her neck, over her breasts and eventually between her thighs until she cums all over his tongue. She instinctively returns the favour, deep-throating every inch of him, and eventually he flips her over and starts hitting it from the back, deep inside of her, stroking every ounce of cream right out of her nani.
How the HELL do you expect a dude to just LEAVE that behind cold turkey? It’s damn near IMPOSSIBLE and THAT’S why so many musty relationships continue even when both people KNOW it’s about to end.
I remember one of my homegirls trying to explain to me what being dickmatized was all about and she went into great detail about how she would zone out FROM LIFE every time her man laid her on her back, spread her legs wide open and stroked her wet nani until she couldn’t take it anymore. She tried to explain how the curve of his richard hit every, deep, sensuous zone inside of her and filled her up to the point where she felt every single vein sliding in and out of her. She said it left her in a trace she couldn’t explain and when she squirt upon orgasm, she would almost instantly fall out and awake in his arms hours later. When they were going through their break-up, the thought of giving up THAT moment of love, lust, passion and protection was what kept her BS relationship alive.
The truth is, that amazing sex and the aftermath of an incredible nut will keep you satisfied and content for an hour or two - just don’t let that override the unhappiness you feel the other 22-23 hours of the day.
This Is Your Conscience
24 Comments, Comment or Ping
lincolnanthonyblades
Ladies & Gentlemen, Do YOU Believe In Break-Up Sex?
Oct 17th, 2012
Paul B.
Not a personal believer in it, but I can see why it appeals to some. It's like putting in a two week notice at your job; those last two weeks are grrreeeaaaat! *Tony the Tiger voice* No stress, you know it's over, it's like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders, and you see the light at the end of the tunnel.Having that knowledge changes the game for you. Unfortunately, the breakup sex could leave you wondering if you really want to leave though. I wouldn't play that game.
Oct 17th, 2012
mena
Never had it so i wouldn't know. When i am done, i am out.
Oct 17th, 2012
NurseJilly
LMAO @ your 2 weeks notice!! Hilarious
Oct 17th, 2012
NurseJilly
That scenario you describe is the exact reason I contemplated the post breakup sex. My ex was nothing short of AMAZING. Damn I miss that… lol
But like you said even mind blowing sex doesn't take away the unhappiness you feel the other 22-23 hours of the day.
Oct 17th, 2012
NurseJilly
Love that song too!! Marsha Ambrosius is my lady crush:)
Oct 17th, 2012
ChloeRayne516
Eh, I've had it. No big deal – key thing to remember is that the peen/vajayjay is like putting a band-aid over a wound, it can help to conceal and temporarily soothe the area but that wound is still there and at some point it will become visible again.
Oct 17th, 2012
lincolnanthonyblades
She was really cute before the weight loss, but now she looks even sexier!
Oct 17th, 2012
lincolnanthonyblades
Yeah I think ALL of us have entertained post-break-up sex at one point in our lives. "
It's so haaaardddd to say goodbyyyyyyyeeee to yesterrrrrdaaaaayyy."
Oct 17th, 2012
lincolnanthonyblades
Yeah breakup sex will have you considering doing sh*t you KNOW is dead wrong.
Oct 17th, 2012
lincolnanthonyblades
The key thing is to wrap it up, before that break-up sex becomes the start of a long lifetime together!
Oct 17th, 2012
NurseJilly
Sure is:(
I think its harder for me because I haven't been with anyone since him. So no new memories to replace the old with… Once that happens I'm sure it'll get a lot easier.
Oct 17th, 2012
NurseJilly
Ya, she's absolutely gorgeous!! I've loved her since her Floetry days.
Oct 17th, 2012
paulb31
Like trying to stay together. I never tried it, but even I can see that it's a bad idea.
Oct 17th, 2012
bellatrice1
It's easy to walk away from mind-blowing sex. I think part of what makes it mind-blowing is the connection, not the actual person's equipment, so I am often confident, I can have that connection with someone else, and that person is not the END of good sex for me.
I think what makes people stay is the thought that they'll never feel that way again and this has PROVEN to be false – at least in my life.
Oct 17th, 2012
petersburgh
I don't believe or encourage it at all
Oct 17th, 2012
lincolnanthonyblades
<img src="http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mc1qtydyoF1qa9yis.gif">
Oct 17th, 2012
daboo18
i totally agree with you, when i went through a break up with my old boyfriend all i could remember was the good times. He was my first which sucked the worst. :{ wish i could have saved my V for my current fiance now.
Oct 17th, 2012
NurseJilly
You killed me with this… Hilarious!!
Oct 17th, 2012
fourpageletter
or you end up pregnant.
Oct 17th, 2012
fourpageletter
*applauds this comment
Oct 17th, 2012
iluvwhoiluv
I'm not really an advocate of break up sex…because it may give false hope to the other person that the two of you not really breaking up–perhaps it's a pause, temporary separation before things go right back into a relationship. Don't tease; if it's done, it's done. Why would one torture him or herself, especially if the sex was dynamite?
Oct 18th, 2012
@undefined
If a man is consistently making me unhappy, my nani isn't gonna get wet for him
Oct 19th, 2012
LisaLisa
this is why there are so many babies being born into the world…….lol
Oct 24th, 2012
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