Ladies, Never, Ever, EVER Propose To Your MAN

Her wanted her on both knees – but NOT like this. Lawd, NEVER like THIS..

As I quickly approach my thirties and see people all around me getting engaged and married, I am becoming even MORE cognizant of the reality that marriage is on the forefront of MANY of our minds. Regardless of whether or not we even see marriage as a realistic option in the foreseeable future, just due to being a grown-ass adult, we have to address this topic in every relationship we enter into now, and hell, even every DATE we go on. All this marriage talk has also opened my eyes to the different, specific circumstances and scenarios people want for the weddings, marriages and even PROPOSALS. Well ladies, if there’s ONE thing I can assure you about proposals, it’s that men DON’T want to be asked by YOU – so proceed at your own risk.

As much as I’m not a proponent of advocating traditional gender roles, I might sound like a damn caveman when I say this, but the truth is NO MAN wants his woman to PROPOSE to him. I don’t care about the 1% of men that actually accepted their wives proposals because those dudes were either held-hostage in an unfortunate situation, or they are the type of weakback dudes who ask their wives for permission to reattach their ballsacks every other weekend when she’s not crushing them in her homemade vice. This is as universal of a truth as universal gets ladies – men WANT the traditional opportunity to propose to YOU – and you robbing him of that is almost grounds for him to reject your proposal, and leave you looking like you just saw Morgan Freeman doing the Gangnam Style dance in boyshorts and a pink Cowboy hat – hurt and confused.

I actually discussed this topic with my boy Marvin in a new video series we will be doing called Bubba Of Truth:

If there is ONE piece of gender role tradition I WANT to hold onto, it’s being able to declare MY love for MY woman and express the full extent of my desire to spend our lives together in my way. I don’t CARE if that makes me sexist in the eyes of an extreme feminist, but I would feel ROBBED of that chance if she proposed to me.

Now there are some women reading this like “Who the hell said WOMEN want to propose in the first place?! Sheeeeeeiiit, I ain’t proposing to no damn man, so he BETTER like the idea of doing it!”And to you women I say, “you would be VERY surprised at what some women are saying these days.” I actually had a conversation with a group of young women who stated they feel it’s POINTLESS to sit around HOPING and WAITING for a man to propose, so they would feel NO WAYS asking their men to marry them. Now I agree that a woman should be able to exercise more options than just HOPING and WAITING, but ASKING HIM should NOT be your first option. Sometimes chivalry ISN’T chauvinism.

This Is Your Conscience

When Lincoln Anthony Blades is not writing for his controversial and critically acclaimed blog ThisIsYourConscience.com, he can be found contributing articles for Uptown Magazine. Lincoln wrote the hilarious and insightful book "You're Not A Victim, You're A Volunteer: How To Stop Letting Love Kick Your Ass". He is also a public speaker who has sat on panels all over North America and the Caribbean.

26 Comments

  1. lincolnanthonyblades

    10/04/2012 at 6:26 AM

    Ladies & Gentlemen, What Do You Think About Women Proposing To Men??

    • Piscean

      10/04/2012 at 8:31 AM

      Maybe I'm just old-fashioned but I would like my man to propose to me. I guess seeing men do it for so many years, has lead me to believe that if my hasn't, it's becuase he doesn't want to. Whether it's due to not being financially ready, not emotionally ready to take that step or not a good time to for him to focus on marriage…that will NOT make me want to ask him myself. Asking him myself would be saying that I for some reason am aware he's not ready to do it, but feel the need to force the issue. Heck no. I don't want a man feeling like he's trapped or guilted in marrying me. I want him to do it because he is sure he wants to spend the rest of his life with me :)

      • lincolnanthonyblades

        10/04/2012 at 3:28 PM

        THANK YOU!

  2. @ThatsLooon

    10/04/2012 at 8:14 AM

    I don't agree with it one bit but that's just me – i feel like if a man wants to marry he will propose no need to force it

    • lincolnanthonyblades

      10/04/2012 at 3:28 PM

      Co-sign!

  3. justgothere

    10/04/2012 at 8:31 AM

    Your web address is incorrect at the end of that video.

    And no for me I would not propose. But wouldn't knock anyone that did.

    • lincolnanthonyblades

      10/04/2012 at 3:28 PM

      Yeah, I had to let dude know.

  4. Lia

    10/04/2012 at 8:33 AM

    I think it's all in what kind of man a woman truly wants and needs. I believe more of us want and need a man to be a leader and take initiative on his own. But there are others who certainly don't fit the bill. I think the whole proposal by a woman thing could blow up in her face if she's not realistic about the type of man she has on her hands, cause a lot of men aren't gonna go for that. I don't really want to make judgments, but the only ones who I could see being on board with this sort of thing are the non-leader types who aren't too sure of their own decision-making abilities in the first place.

  5. mena

    10/04/2012 at 8:41 AM

    Men need to pursue. Bottom line. If a man wants to be with you, then he will move mountains to make you his. Same goes for marriage. The man should ask.

    • lincolnanthonyblades

      10/04/2012 at 3:29 PM

      Agreed!

  6. @futuresatellite

    10/04/2012 at 8:54 AM

    Hmmm, I personally wouldn't propose to a man but I'm not knocking a woman who did or plans to. I don't think which person proposes predicts whether the marriage will last or if the marriage will even happen (engagements can be broken).

    • lincolnanthonyblades

      10/04/2012 at 3:32 PM

      I'll knock her in this sense: She better check to see if that sh*t is cool with her man first, because she really could piss him off with that BS.

  7. imakesense

    10/04/2012 at 9:32 AM

    Is there a difference between her proposing and her telling him to propose/forcing marriage?

    • cynicaloptmst81

      10/04/2012 at 12:08 PM

      No difference at all. Both are very wrong, lol.

    • KemaVA

      10/05/2012 at 10:12 AM

      lol! I told mine to propose and to do it well. Hey I was 19!

  8. iluvwhoiluv

    10/04/2012 at 10:11 AM

    Yes, I admit–I am a bit old fashioned. I would like for the guy to propose to me. I would never take it upon myself to do so, no matter how much I wanted to get married.

    • lincolnanthonyblades

      10/04/2012 at 3:31 PM

      GOOD!

  9. cynicaloptmst81

    10/04/2012 at 12:15 PM

    HA! Tell this to Chrissy…or Chrissy's Aunt! (I do NOT watch that show…I just happened to watch a few episodes that season to have a point of reference when the show came up in discussions.)

    I think women proposing to men throws the universe off, lol. I'd never do it or support it. If I'm tired of waiting and hoping for my man to ask, I'll just walk.

    I don't think people really understand what it means to be a husband…its a really BIG job. In some ways, deeper than being a wife. Its a role that a man must come to terms with on his own in his own time.

    • lincolnanthonyblades

      10/04/2012 at 3:31 PM

      That last paragraph is nothing but the truth! I think that will go over most people's heads..

  10. bellatrice1

    10/04/2012 at 12:53 PM

    Ummmm yeah, no…not gonna happen. I wouldn't even ask a guy out. I'm a bit of a traditionalist.

    • lincolnanthonyblades

      10/04/2012 at 3:30 PM

      Ok you took it too far there! lol

      • bellatrice1

        10/04/2012 at 5:26 PM

        It's the same concept to me honestly. If he wants you, he'll step to you. If not, then it just wasn't meant to be. Forget a spartan!! lol

        It's getting progressively easier for men, not over here though

        • lincolnanthonyblades

          10/04/2012 at 6:10 PM

          Wait what's easier for men?

  11. lincolnanthonyblades

    10/04/2012 at 3:30 PM

    Exactly! Depending on what type of man he is, he may not accept that as a compliment.

  12. bellatrice1

    10/04/2012 at 6:15 PM

    Dating, courting, getting it, etc. If we take away the need for them to man up and approach a woman of interest, what will they have left? Men need to be men. They like the chase.

  13. Sterling Milonas

    05/07/2013 at 6:46 AM

    Psy likened the Gangnam District to Beverly Hills, California, and said in an interview that he intended in a twisted sense of humour by claiming himself to be “Gangnam Style” when everything about the song, dance, looks, and the music video is far from being such a high class.`^

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