YOU Should Become The Person YOU Want To Marry

Last night on my “Let Me Tell You Why You’re Wrong” Radio Show, I was joined by a special guest, award-nominated relationship blogger, author and sexpert Nikki True (from, who provided nothing but REAL TALK on many issues we ALL deal with while dating, in relationships and on the single scene. After the show was over [which you can listen to at:] Nikki offered me the opportunity to read her new ebook, “First Comes Me – The Guide To Falling In Love With Yourself” where she offered up a common sense reality about dating and falling in love, that MANY people could use in their OWN pursuit of the perfect partner: “Become the person YOU would MARRY.”

That line, which is name of one of her chapters in the ebook, is extremely short, yet genius in it’s simplicity. One of the biggest problems with dating nowadays is there are too many MUSTY-ASS people who feel entitled to this great person – yet haven’t even begun to lay the foundation for THEIR OWN greatness. And then after years of toiling around being single and becoming a bitter serial dater, they eventually start losing hope in humankind which is HILARIOUSbecause they are looking for someone, that they aren’t even close to being themselves.

How in the HELL can YOU complain about the dating scene being absent of high-quality people, when YOU’RE not high quality? You got men out here complaining there’s NO wife-material women left because they want a woman who is Condileeza Rice in the classroom, Oprah in her career, Elena Arzak in the kitchen and Jada Fire in the bedroom. But his monkey-ass done dropped out of college, has made zero strides to get out of his dead-end career, can’t cook toast and gives weak-back richard. And before ANY woman starts laughing, y’all are guilty of the SAME BS.

Before we all harp on what there ISN’T enough of in society, and demonize other people for what we perceive as terrible shortcomings, we need to take a damn second and ask ourselves HONESTLY if WE even embody the type of person we wish we saw more of in society. If the answer is NO, then we got a LOT of damn work to do before we start to cast judgement upon other people. It’s so damn easy to knock others for what we think they SUCK at, but if we SUCK at true self-reflection, then what’s the point of making that criticism in the first place? The truth is, YOU should be the change YOU want to see in the world, and when you reach THAT level you probably won’t have to complain about what you DON’T have, because you will have already found it. Like Common said:

“Time helps mistakes, you can learn from/
Cuz one man f*^ked up men you shouldn’t turn from/
You want a certain type of guy, gotta reach a certain point too/
At the destination, a king will annoint you”

This Is Your Conscience

p.s. To all my readers of TIYC, don’t say I never gave y’all anything for FREE. If you click the link BELOW you can download Nikki True’s Ebook today for FREE. This free sale for the readers of TIYC ends TONIGHT at 12 AM, so make sure you download ASAP.


Lincoln Anthony Blades can be found on Twitter at @LincolnABlades and on Instagram at @ThisIsYourConscience